Pride and Prejudice and Zombies

At first it was pretty funny, the first few pages I laughed and thought it was sort of cute but the it becomes more like bad fan fiction.

It doesn’t feel like Grahame-Smith is a Janiet, quite the opposite. It feels like he’s making fun of the whole story (and not in a good way) and changing a lot of the characters. Would Mr. Bennet sleep with prostitutes while in China? Of course not! Would Jane be capable of hitting Kitty and Lydia with wet bamboo? Hell no! Would Mrs. Gardner have a polish lover called Sylak? No she wouldn’t!

Silly silly silly… I have to read “Mansfield Park” now to remedy myself from this experience.

This is one of the reasons I’m not big on food

(picture by Anna Skoog and the to the right it says Divine salad, not so sure about that)

I found this recipe on a salad and it looked so yummy and sounded pretty darn yummy too so I had to wait a year so that there were fresh blackberries in the store, they were a little expensive but I want to follow the recipe so I got them, along with the arugula salad which you get in a tiny little bag with a big juicy price tag on it and Serrano ham was 14 slices for 60 SEK. And the figs costs way more than apples…When you spend some money you (at least me) expect that it will taste lovely but I’m not so sure.

The dressing is just like any other dressing, don’t like it, taste blah and the ham! Ew, smells like feet/cheese!

Haven’t eaten the actual salad yet so we’ll see but… I always get disappointed in the kitchen unless I’m making desserts.

Waiting for the first storm

(Photo by Deoradhain)

It’s time for the first fall storm, can’t wait. A few trees usually gets knocked down, unfortunately my neighbor cut all their trees down (illegally) so they can’t get squished under them (but maybe some other horrible things can happened to them?).

Upcoming movies

The Nines: Written and directed by John August, he’s written a few scripts for Tim Burton so I feel it’s my duty to see what he’s up to on his own. I don’t know much about the movie; I want to be surprised so I’ll keep it that way.

Disturbia: I saw the trailer and it looked like fun so… There are a few things in the trailer that I liked, I hope I wasn’t fooled. Not a fan of that Shia guy but, I’ll live through it I’m sure.

Oldboy: It’s on top 250 so I have to watch it but I think it looks interesting so hopefully it won’t be one of those movies were you suffer for a 120 minutes.

The Order

The Order: A young priest goes to Rome to investigate the mysterious death of his mentor and head of Order. As always when people go to Rome to investigate things within the church all hell breaks loose with a bunch of weird societies, demons and whatnot, you know the drill. There is no reason what so ever to see this movie unless you are a Heath fan and want to see all of his movies. There is no suspense, no nothing…

Best thing in the movie: Heath all dressed in black. Note to self, buy a new black coat this fall.

Behind the Mask: The Rise of Leslie Vernon

Behind the Mask: The Rise of Leslie Vernon The movie starts as a documentary where we get to follow Leslie Vernon who’s preparing himself to début as the new psycho killer in a world where the likes of Freddy Krueger and Michael Myers are real people and events. The film crew with Taylor Gentry in the lead tags along Leslie in his daily life and the preparations for the event that will make him a legend.

Maybe Jason Voorhees brings a crossword with him to the bathroom, maybe he has dinner in front of the TV watching The Simpsons but we don’t want to see that, we want to see what he does best, chasing and killing people with his machete while wearing his stylish mask. But in this movie we get to see the mass murderer in the makings life and it is a sad life with cardio exercise and living with his pet turtles. He makes lame jokes with the film crew and it reminds me of a sad interview with Ron Jeremy (who also has a pet turtle) and his attempt to be a standup comedian except then I felt for poor Ron but here the actor is not good enough for me to feel any kind of pity for him.

The movie makes a sudden turn at the end, from lame comedy to what seems to be an attempt to be an action/horror but it’s impossible to take it serious when we know that the “monster” lives with his pet turtles Church and Zoe. More of one genre and less of the other would have been nice because the mixture of the two is a complete failure.

There are a few interesting events when there’s a hint of chemistry between Leslie and Taylor similar to that of Clarice Starling and Hannibal Lecter but unfortunately they remain only hints and perhaps I was the only one that felt them. I liked the idea of the journalist getting to close to her subject and have a hard time to stay neutral but…

If you listen to the dialog and have seen at least one horror movie before I doubt there will be any surprises in this movie. Apparently it’s supposed to be a fun satire of the genre but I didn’t get it.

Checklist

· Spooky abandoned house
· Stoned teenagers
· Blonde virgin
· Cars that doesn’t start
· Creepy mask
· Things we’ve seen before

The best thing in the movie: Leslies mask and Zelda Rubinstein

Breakfast at Tiffany’s

Didn’t get the story, or the other two short stories in the book. Now I’m afraid that the movie Breakfast at Tiffany’s will be dull too. But the movie looks incredible stylish, it could be a spread in any fashion magazine. Very pretty indeed, and it looks better than the book so, I’ll keep my fingers crossed.

Day Watch

Day Watch: Anton is back to fight more forces of darkness… Um I have to admit I didn’t completely follow what is going on. It’s not as good as the first one and by the end of it I’m not really sure what happened or what to think of it.

Because it’s Russian I don’t mind the silliness, I guess this is what it’s like for foreigners when they watch a movie like, “Let the right one in”, I can’t stand that movie but maybe others go, “But it’s Swedish so I don’t mind”’

It does feel refreshing something different from your typical American action film but it’s 140 minutes long!

Best thing in the movie: Svetlanas blue Muppet coat. Only Patsy from Absolutely Fabulous and Svetlana can get away with wearing something like that.

Next movies are…

Behind the Mask: The Rise of Leslie Vernon The trailer is probably very misleading, in the beginning it’s a bit spooky with Zelda Rubinsteins (Tangina in Poltergiest) monolog and then it looks like a comedy all of a sudden and then back to horror, doubt it will be a scary film but I bet it’s scarier than Saw. Not only is Zelda in the movie, we also have Robert Englund aka Freddie Krueger and Angela Goethals who plays Kevins sister in Home Alone so I’ll expected her to go: “you're what the French call les incompetents” Oh, and there is one guy with the name Britain Spellings which I just think is funny enough to mention.



Day Watch: The sequel to Night Watch by Russian director Timur Bekmambetov who did Wanted (which I have to see one of these days because it looks like crap). The first movie ended sort of abruptly so I want closer in this one but… I might be disappointed.

The car thing in the trailer is ridicules (and not in a good way).

An American Haunting

A little scared as I’m about to put the disc in, keeping on light on and I’m watching it on the computer which is extra scary because you’re so close to the screen then. 87 minutes and go…

It begins with “based on a true story” so naturally that means that it is not. It’s 1817 and strange things are happening in the Bell family house in Red River Tennessee. Betsy the family’s precious daughter is suffering from violent nightmares.

It starts off as being very promising, I got scared. Angles, creepy noises, the wind through the trees and mist but it doesn’t last I’m afraid (well actually it’s a good thing since I’m off to bed). Turns cliché in the middle and by the end of the movie I’m no longer scared at all.

I like Donald and Sissy but you need more than good actors to make a good movie. The movie could not live up to my expectations, you’re better off to watch the trailer or the first 40-50 minutes of the movie.



The trailer is pretty misleading, it makes the movie look scary and I did feel it wasn’t the same story as the actual movie. The feeling I got when I watched the trailer was better than the movie and it’s not the first time I’ve been fooled by the trailer, and probably not the last.

Upcoming movie

An American Haunting, I don’t really like horror, A) I get scared and B) they are rarely good movies but Donald Sutherland is in it and it sets, partially in the 1800’s which is a time period I really like so. I just hope it’s not too scary…

Saw

People have been talking about these Saw movies and they’ve made five(!) of them so I thought it was time to see what the fuss was about, and I still don’t know.

Twenty minutes in and it feels more like forty, it’s going to be a long movie. At times it looks like an old 90’s video but without music. The setup with flashbacks makes the story less scary, well it’s not scary at all, I didn’t even feel the need to pick up feet up from the floor until was tired and lay down on the sofa.

They put a lot of focus on the “scary” details to make sure no one misses them which make them less scary and like I’m being treated like an idiot.

Maybe I have seen too many movies because there were no surprises in this one. A little like “The Village” where you quickly realize that things aren’t what they seem and they will try to make as many “unexpected” turns as they can to surprised us which makes it so much easier to figure out what is going to happened next.

The whole movie makes me thing of “The Shinning” and when the black guy rushes up to the house on a scoter (if I remember correctly) only to get an axe in the back minutes after entering the house.

Best thing in the movie: Danny Glover (mainly because I watched a lot of his movies growing up so I just like to see his face)

The Informant!

I don’t like Matt Damon, in fact I avoid him (I give him the cold shoulder every time I pass him in the street) but it looks like he can portrait an idiot pretty well so I might have to sit through one of his films yet again.

Steven Soderberghs new film The Informant! Is based on the book with the same name by Kurt Eichenwald and based on the trailer it looks like fun.

The Devil’s Foot Steps

I quickly started to think of the movies based on Stephen King stuff when I read this book. Apparently it’s EE Richardson first book and he was only 19 when the publishers bought it so… I guess I’m too old for it but there story is plain and there are no ups and downs or any struggle, the events just neatly unfolds without any drama.

V for Vendetta

I find it a little hard to take Natalie Portman serious at time because she (speaks with a British accent) looks like a child, a very pretty child but a child none the less. She’s a good actress but she looks so young I expect her to stomp her feet, throw fits and slam doors.

I like the theatricals of the film but… there was something missing for me to really like this movie. I feel like such a snob because I’m so picky about movies.

Loved Stephen Fry, he was the best thing in the movie, he’s always so adorable. I want to sit down and have tea with him, seems like a nice tea drinking buddy.

Franklyn

It was a link to the Franklyn trailer after something else I had watched on Youtube and I ended up clicking on it and it looks interesting. I don’t like Ryan Phillippe at all but maybe Eva Green can make up for it. It looks nice, a good film to watch this autumn, but if it gets here it will probably be in the springtime…

Eva Green

Day after tomorrow

“Day after tomorrow” is one of those movies where they rely on “cool” effects and pay very little attention to plot and characters.

When the hurricanes hit LA I wanted to laugh, it was such bad acting if felt like a parody. The lovely Ian Holm was in the back and didn’t get any room and did you ever find out what happened to him? Assumed dead but it was never confirmed, I like to believe he made it but I’m very doubtful.

The movie left me without making any impressions whatsoever, well other than “Hey, that Emmy chick is really cute. What is she up to these days?” that and, “That Jake guy is kind of cute too.”

Found this cute site

I found a link on Old Hollywood Glamour to this nice site called The Black Wardrobes Blog. It’s a digital showroom for my hand-made dark little pieces and there’s stuff on goth fashion, goth and fashion in genre, art nouveau and other nice dark things. Her store is of course called The Black Wardrobe and is handmade film noir inspired clothing.

This is apparently a picture that inspired her and I can see why, love it!

Hmm…

Okay, so I watched “The Prestige”, what was the point with that movie? Dull dull dull… I enjoyed “Lesbian Vampire Killers” way more and that says a lot doesn’t it.

Free movies!

I got an offer to try this thing where you get dvds in your mailbox, free for two month so there’s going to be LOTS of movies these two months!

First up Casino Royale: Okay a hairless guy opens the door for a guy with a Hitler do and a scar; can this be the bad guy? I know the guy is Danish aka accent, aka The Bad Guy. Oh, and he’s weeping blood insisting that it’s nothing sinister… Only a Bad Guy says that.

I only wanted to see it because it’s one of those movies people talk about, I don’t know why because it was just a movie… What’s good about it? The best thing Vesper Lynds lipstick.

Next up: The Prestige. Have a little crush on Bale (since I was a little girl and he played Jim in Treasure Island) and it’s on top 250 so I have to see it eventually anyway. Michael Caine is always good and I like Hugh Jackman, a little frosty feelings towards Scarlett Johansson but… I have no expectations what so ever about this movie. (I prefer the word film… I think I’ll start to use it more often)

I'm not the bad guy, really I'm not...